Relationships are strengthened by two people being present for one another. Physically, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and any other ‘ly’ that exists. When you show up for one another during the good and bad times, this is what increases love and character. Many of us are relying so much on text, tweets, Dating Apps, and Instagram posts, that we’ve bypassed the beauty of physically being present in someone’s life. What an awesome way for two people to spend their days and nights together.
Physical presence provides chemical, relational, psychological, and physiological effects that virtual relationships cannot. Our brains change in the presence of another person and their behavior. -Henry Cloud
We just can’t substitute body language, physical touch, being able to look into another person’s eyes, and whispering to each other, with Zoom calls and Instagram FaceTime. These things are only a convenience, but a relationship can’t be built upon these things. We must show up for our partner physically to establish intimacy and love.
Intimate relationships require work. However, how can two people work on their relationship if they never or barely see one another? That’s a rhetorical question because the answer is obvious. They can’t. It’s just as Ellie said in That Awkward Moment, “Being there for someone when they really need you, that’s all relationships are…”
When you love someone, the best thing you can offer is your presence. How can you love if you are not there?-Thich Nhat Hanh
Of course, Ellie’s statement was a bit of hyperbole (it’s a movie). Relationships consist of more than that, but the point is still accurate. If two people in a relationship are not willing to show up for one another through good and bad times, what kind of relationship do they really have? It’s more like what people are terming now, A Situationship.
The only way we can truly love someone is by knowing them. Ergo, the only way to know a person is to be present in his or her life during good and bad times. After all, the true character of any person can only be known during times of tests and trials. There’s an old saying, “By opposites things are known.” It doesn’t have to be a chore. Do turn it into a job. Just start with a cup of coffee, and start showing up more for one another after that.
For relationship coaching, advice, and resources, go to Louis’ Link Tree: