Showing Up For It All In An Intimate Relationship

I begin with a fantastic proposal. A chance to experience ups and downs, highs and lows, and everything in between with a person that inspires us to be better during all those circumstances. Many of us are relying so much on texts and tweets, Snapchat and Instagram posts, that we’ve bypassed the beauty of physically being present in someone’s life. What an awesome way for two people to spend their days and nights together.

I am not oblivious to the fact that Covid-19 does not allow such interaction, but this too shall pass, and we must be prepared for it. Prepared to meet and spend time with others for intimate companionship. Now let me be clear, some people look at this blessing as a curse. Or even worse, other’s let the wrong person into their lives. News flash… It’s better to be alone than to burden oneself with that situation.

It is quite unfortunate that some of us believe that life shouldn’t consist of good times and bad times, happiness and sadness, pleasure, and pain. Due to this unrealistic view, it spills over into our romantic relationships and as soon as there’s a little turbulence, we’re ready to bail.

Intimate relationships require work. There is absolutely no substitute when it comes to developing a strong bond with another person. I saw a movie called: That Awkward Moment, where the main character, played by Zac Efron, his girlfriend’s father died. When he found out about it, he didn’t go console her at all. As a matter of fact, he didn’t even go to the funeral. When he decided to go see her, she told him, “Being there for someone when they really need you, that’s all relationships are…”

Now of course, it was an exaggerated statement (it’s a movie). Relationships consist of more than that, but the point is still accurate. If we are not willing to struggle and go through hard times with another person, we need to find someone who just wants to party all the time. However, if that’s the goal, true love and intimacy doesn’t exist in that space.

The only way we can truly love someone is by knowing them. Ergo, the only way to know a person is to be present in his or her life during good and bad times. After all, the true character of any person can only be known during times of tests and trials. There’s an old saying, “By opposites things are known.”

For people who want a solid and lasting bond with someone, it requires being present during the rough times as well as the easy ones. We must show up for each other. Start with a cup of coffee, move to having meals together, and grow from there.


Louis Morris

Louis Morris

Louis Morris is a Certified Relationship Coach who helps couples deal with marital and relationship discord involving issues of communication, intimacy, and helping them enhance their spiritual and emotional connection. He also assists singles who are divorced, been through a break-up, or lost a partner to get their groove back.


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