Even before I began coaching people about love, intimacy, and connection, I would ask myself, “What does love look like?” It’s the young couple who have gotten past the infatuation and lustful stage but are still fascinated with one another. They have chemistry and things in common, so they find that delicate balance between spending time and giving each other space. They understand and practice the old adage, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
They’ve seen enough from one another to know that even their opposites attract. They have different views and tastes on many things, but those issues bring them closer together. Love looks like a couple who’s been together for 30 years. Yet, they are still intimate and affectionate. Their fascination continues to grow as they expand their individual horizons. They had a mission and passions before they met, and these things have only grown due to their growth as individuals and as a couple.
Love appears after fights and petty gripes with apologies and forgiveness because their connection is more important than them being right. Love is like the changing of seasons. Sometimes it’s hot and humid, cool and sunny, and sometimes, it’s rainy and cold. But they are there for one another under all the changing conditions. This long-term commitment is built upon the pillars of spirituality, chemistry, communication, and trust.
Love is cuddling on the couch. Being silent sometimes when speaking will only make things worse. Love is spending time apart to make the time together better. It’s going through the pleasures and pains, ups and downs of life as a team. Love is work that both people find pleasure in. After all, they are passionate about the person they work with on a daily basis.
Love looks like paying bills, grocery shopping, and taking trips together. Love is commitment and sacrifice. Love has many different components and complexions. But when it’s done right, for the right reasons, love looks fantastic!
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