Even before I began coaching people about love, intimacy, and connection, I would ask myself, “What does love look like?” It’s the young couple who have gotten past the infatuation and lustful stage but are still fascinated with one another. They have chemistry and things in common, so they find that delicate balance between spending time and giving each other space. Even during times of social distancing.
They’ve seen enough from one another to know that even their opposites attract. They have different views and taste on many things, but those issues bring them closer together. Love looks like the couple who’s been together for 30 years. Yet, they are still intimate and affectionate. Their fascination continues to grow as they expand their individual horizons. They had a mission and passions before they met, and these things have only grown since they have been a couple.
Love appears after fights and petty gripes with apologies and forgiveness because their connection is more important than them being right. Love is like the changing of seasons. Sometimes it’s hot and humid, cool and sunny, and sometimes, it’s rainy and cold. But they are there for one another under all the changing conditions. This long-term commitment is built upon the pillars of chemistry, communication, and trust.
Love is cuddling on the couch, being quiet when speaking will make things worse, spending time apart to make the time together better, and going through pleasure and pain as a team. Love is work that both people find pleasure in. After all, they are passionate about the one they work with.
Love looks like paying bills, grocery shopping, and taking trips together. Love is commitment and sacrifice. Love has many different components and complexions. But when it’s done right, for the right reasons, love looks fantastic!