A relationship, like any other human connection, has ingredients. Love, affection, intimacy, good communication, etc. On the other hand, there are certain ingredients that should never be thrown into the pot. If they are added to the mix, they could destroy the whole thing. Below, I have listed 5 things that should be avoided at all costs.
This is where one or both participants have a gloomy outlook about everything. In most cases, this comes from the way they were raised, past relationships, not having the proper attitude concerning failure and missed opportunities, and a myriad of other reasons. However, none of them are justifiable and they will cause problems in the relationship.
One such problem is depression. This is a real thing, which is one of the reasons the Prophets and Messengers would ask God to protect them from depression. The opposite of depression is happiness and contentment. If one or both partners always see the glass as half full, even during times when they’re supposed to be enjoying themselves, it will become another occasion to complain.
I used to work in a restaurant and I would see it all the time. A couple would come in for Valentine’s Day or an anniversary and if they weren’t seated right away or their food didn’t come 10 minutes after they ordered it, either one of them or both of them would start complaining. How is that a happy occasion? So, if pessimism exists in the relationship, get rid of it.
2 Constantly Being Attached To Your Phone
Unfortunately, many of us have become so attached to our phones that we are more intimate with it than we are with our significant other. It can get to a point where our partner begins to feel insignificant. It goes without saying, this could have a profound negative effect on our relationship.
We have to set boundaries with this thing we carry around all the time. Let me provide an affirmation statement that might help when we’re trying to spend time with our partner but keep paying attention to our phone: Human Contact Is Better. Just repeat that to yourself when you think about grabbing it during a meal or on a date. Remember, “Human contact is better.”
3 Not Sharing The Chores
This is a no-no on many levels. Do we want our partners to feel like they are the housekeeper? This will be the feeling if we don’t agree to share household chores with our significant other.
Now, I’m not saying it will cause the other person to end the relationship. But the other person might feel taken for granted, which will lead to arguments that could easily be avoided if we agree to help out around the house.
4 Always Complaining About Work
There is nothing wrong with talking with your partner about things that are taking place at work. After all, this gives him or her a chance to make suggestions and be supportive. However, don’t make it a constant part of your relationship. It will wear your partner down, and he or she might stop supporting these complaints and become angry.
In other words, don’t always bring the job home. It’s all about balance so you can get support and advice from the person you love.
5 Keeping Score
I did this for you… You didn’t do that for me… This is a surefire way to cause problems in a union. The attitude between two people in a healthy union is one of cooperation and support. Not of, I’m doing more and you’re doing less. A relationship is a partnership between two people who care for one another.
When you really care for someone, you don’t count what you do for them and try to measure what they do for you. The actions come from the heart; therefore, they are not about keeping score. They’re about continually nurturing the relationship and moving forward as a team.
If these 5 things are part of your existing union or you are thinking about bringing them into the next one. Get rid of them and don’t carry them into the next relationship.
Schedule a call with Louis for the Get Your Groove Back Plan or The Relationship Rescue Plan. Follow him on Instagram for more relationship tips and advice.